Sunday, June 10, 2012

Aging Gracefully Part II

I’m still thinking about this aging business. When you find that your own personal end of life is sooner than you had thought, it changes things. There are all those stages you go through—denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. Somewhere between denial and anger I find myself wanting to run around waving my arms in the air and shouting, “No, no. It’s all going too fast. I’m running out of time and I’m not done!” Then when it turns out that I’m actually not out of time, I forget all those important things that I thought I didn’t have time for and settle back into real life. Of course I did make a bucket list and I even managed to cross off quite a few of the things I put on it. Riding a Harley, zip lining, getting a puppy (two actually). Check, check, check. But right now this idea that I will soon enter the “old-old” part of my senior years is unsettling me. Last night I read an interview that Bill Moyers did with Sara Lawrence Lightfoot and think I like her views on aging better than the gerontologist’s view. She had dubbed the quarter century of life between the ages of fifty and seventy-five “the third chapter”. I like that because it implies a “forth chapter”. Yes, I know that implies living to the age of one hundred but since I’m not in the forth chapter yet, I won’t worry about that technicality. Ms Lightfoot says that this period is one of focusing energy, finding new means of expression and defining our personal passions. We can take time to step back and see what really matters to us and how we can cultivate our own creativity. She believes that maturity can help us be more innovative and purposeful. That all sounds good, but the danger for me, once the crisis is past, is that I will pop my metaphorical thumb back in my mouth and like Rosann Rosanna Danna say, “Never mind”.

3 comments:

  1. Great photo on the swing- brings back the visit on Lopez Island at the house in eternal shade... but had a great swing~!~ yes, interesting concept to "focus energy, find new means of expression and define passions," at each new stage we are so fortunate to enter...is what I would suggest~ Oh, may we be so fortunate to hold on to the wonder of life in gratitude and awe~~~
    So refreshing and inspiring to find your posts again, dear sweet Edythe Ann says!

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  2. In the words of Gordon Lightfoot

    If you could read my mind, love
    What a tale my thoughts would tell

    We’re all aging and, surprisingly, at the same rate. But life isn’t what you have, it’s who you are. If you believe in a God of your understanding, it’s unlikely that, at the end, you will hear “So how’d you do? Make any money?” No, I expect to hear “What did you do with all that I gave you?” It’s the only question that makes any sense to me. The closest of my friends are the givers, not the earners, and none are takers.

    Yes, it’s going too fast for us all and we really are running out of time. We just don’t get to know when it’s all going to end. I, too, am in the third quarter (OK, chapter if you must). I know I’m behind on the giving versus taking scoreboard but I think I’m gaining. I hope to at least tie the score by the end of the quarter but the outcome will likely be in doubt until the end of the game. Maybe I can edge into the lead if I am granted a fourth quarter and, who knows, maybe I’ll even make it into overtime.

    Let me quote another singer-philosopher, forgotten by most but not so long ago universally adored:

    A comfortable old age is the reward of a well-spent youth. Instead of its bringing sad and melancholy prospects of decay, it would give us hopes of eternal youth in a better world.

    Maurice Chevalier

    Good enough for me.

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    Replies
    1. Wow! As always, your words bless and challenge me. They say, "Talk is cheap", but I think words are precious and provide windows to the hearts and minds of others that we seldom get in our day to day interactions. Thank you!

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